In a world with so many challenges to deal with, one of the best gifts you can give to your child is training on assertiveness. Wikipedia defines assertiveness as the quality of being self-assured and confident without being aggressive. Your child will be exposed to many circumstances — some good and others bad. Your child will need to navigate through each of them and hopefully emerge a better person.
Don’t assume that this is a lesson best left for when your child is older. As early as age 2, your child will be bombarded by situations in which he or she will need to be firm but polite. The story in the following post explains a real-life situation:
Raising an Assertive Child
During my recent trip home to New York, I found myself cringing on a few occasions when my two-year-old daughter and I were with my friends and their children. The scenarios were similar in all cases, but the characters were different. Child A would forcefully take an object from child B leading to a tug-of-war which would end with one or both of the children erupting into tears. In cases when my daughter was the instigator, I had no problem interjecting to explain to her how such aggression can hurt people’s feelings, why she should try to use her words, and how she could resolve the situation.
When my daughter was on the receiving end of the aggression, however, I struggled with how to react. On the one hand, I wanted my daughter to stick up for herself, but on the other hand, my empathetic side kicked in and I found myself asking her to be patient with her friend and to let them have the object in question until they were ready to share it. Read more at CSA…
Whenever you witness your child confronted by a conflict, how you react or respond will either train them to be assertive or deny them the opportunity to flex their assertive muscle.
Interestingly, children often do what they see adults doing, more than what they are told to do. So if you want to train your child to be assertive, he or she must see it in you, as the following post describes:
So how do we show our children how to be assertive? There are 3 simple steps:
We need to model assertiveness in our own communications – all the time.
Clearly and politely stating what we want and need. Children watch us all the time. So instead of muttering your partner is a lazy so and so and why do you have to do ALL the work around the house, rather than slamming doors or sulking communicate assertively instead. Let your children hear you speak clearly, calmly and confidently about the problem with a suggestion for how it could improve to your liking.
Show assertiveness in how you relate to others. You also need to display assertiveness in the way you handle him or her as the child. Your son or daughter should know that if mummy or daddy say no, they mean it.
There are obvious challenges that may hinder your child from being assertive. Identifying and addressing them will enable your child to overcome them. The following post describes some of them and how to deal with them:
As parents, we tread a fine line: we want our kids to be able to stand up for themselves and others, to ask for help and voice their opinions. But we also don’t want them to be aggressive, pushy, or bossy.
It’s tricky to balance the two, and some kids struggle more than others with asserting themselves. Why is that? I’ve found a few contributing factors:
- Your child might not understand what another child is saying. Maybe they don’t know what they’re supposed to do, or what’s expected of them.
- Fear of doing something wrong. Many kids keep quiet when they don’t or shouldn’t have to because they’re afraid of making mistakes.
- Avoiding attention. Not all kids want attention, and some see assertion as drawing too much attention to themselves.
Lack of experience. Kids, especially those who’ve only dealt with adults, may never have had to assert themselves or make their own case before. Read more at Sleeping Should Be Easy…
Helping your child to find the balance between being assertive and aggressive is a process that will take time, but will eventually be worth it. Your child will thank you later, and you will be glad you trained him to be so.
Your efforts to train your child to be assertive should be reinforced in school. This means that you need to choose your child’s preschool carefully.
Spanish for Fun is a preschool dedicated to providing high-quality education for every child. Ours is a Spanish-immersion program where children have the opportunity to learn the Spanish language and culture, as well as other foundational studies. We also have teachers who are specially trained to handle children with tender loving care and assertiveness.
We have awesome programs that can accommodate your needs. One of them is Parent and Me, where your child can transition into the preschool world with you by their side. We have lots of fun as we learn, and you can be sure your child will love the experience.
Spanish for fun! combines the loving care your child needs with Spanish language education, cultural learning and lots of fun. Get in touch with us today to schedule a tour of our Spanish for Fun Childcare Wake Forest campus. Call 919-677-7114 or complete the form on our website and we’ll contact you. We look forward to showing you why your child will thrive with us.
As a parent, there is so much to think about when it comes to your children’s welfare. Before they start school, you are largely preoccupied with their diet and health. Just making sure they are healthy and strong is a full-time preoccupation. When they start preschool, the game changes.
This transition introduces your child to a whole new environment. This is why it also becomes very important for you to pay attention to your child’s psychological health. Perhaps the best way to get started is to get an overview of what child psychology is about and what it means for your child. The following post discusses this in detail:
5 Important Things Child Psychology Teaches Us About Children
The study of the psychological processes of children – and specifically, how these processes differ from those of adults, how they develop from birth to the end of adolescence, and how and why they differ from one child to the next- is a specialised branch of psychology, known as child psychology. Child psychologists work with children and adolescents to diagnose and help resolve issues causing emotional or behavioural problems, such as learning disabilities, attention deficit disorder, hyperactivity, anxiety, and depression. They also evaluate children for developmental delays, signs of autism spectrum disorder and other problems that affect development. Read more at SACAP…
You need to understand, however, that child psychology isn’t just for the identification and management of problems. Child psychology helps you know and interpret your child’s inner life.
Certain aspects of your child psychology are very important, but very few know about them. One example is psychological rest. Just like you plan for your child’s sleeping time, it’s important that he gets psychological rest as well. The following post explains how this can be done:
What about psychological rest?
Psychological rest is much less talked about, but becoming more relevant each day as adults and children alike are inundated with the rapid advances that technology brings.
Enter social media and its incredibly addictive nature. We see both children and adults glued to their phones and screens. Many children in our society have their phones with them 24/7. Their brains and bodies are on high alert for the next text, ‘like’, or comment. This is simply not a place of rest for them, and they need this rest in order to help them emerge as separate beings, adapt to life’s challenges, and mature. On top of not getting the psychological rest they need, these kids are texting well into the night and compromising their sleep needs dramatically.
As discussed above, training your children to get enough psychological rest is essential. That way, they will grow up into adults that are confident about themselves and their abilities.
It is also important to inform your children that they will experience challenges in life. This preparation, as well as learning how to handle them, are vital. The following post talks about the importance of counseling for your child:
Benefits of child counseling
A few examples of how counseling can help children include; coping with everyday worries, such as exam stress, and relationship issues with friends, family members and teachers. Counseling can also help with self-harm concerns, grief, depression and anxiety, and learning difficulties, to name a few.
Really, if something is making your child unhappy, however small you or they feel it is, it’s important. Know that help is available – counselling allows your child to talk to someone about what’s on their mind safely and confidently, without fear of judgement.
There is no right or wrong reason to why someone may consider counseling. Sometimes it’s just good to talk to someone objective, other times more guidance may be needed. Read more at Counseling Directory…
If you start early, you can develop a strong relationship with your child so that he can come to you for counsel. This would be ideal. However, other times, he may need to talk to someone else, and that is okay. The most important thing is that you have addressed your child’s psychological needs.
One way to protect your child’s welfare is to enroll him or her in a good preschool. At Spanish For Fun, we are particularly keen on providing a loving and fun preschool experience. We are an accredited Spanish-immersion preschool. Your child will enjoy the benefits of bilingualism and develop critical life skills that will ensure his or her psychological well-being is taken care of.
Our staff is trained to handle children with tender, loving care, with a special emphasis on the five love languages as outlined by Dr. Gary Chapman in his groundbreaking book on the subject.
Get in touch with us today to schedule a tour. We would be delighted to show you our facility and our time-proven teaching methods. Call (919) 883-2061 or complete the form on our website. We look forward to speaking with you soon.
There are many wise sayings related to friends, the company we keep, and the effect their presence and influence has on us. As a parent, you may be wondering how to manage the impact — both positive and negative — of your child’s friends, especially when he or she reaches school-going age and peers become a significant social force. It is important to know when to simply advise your child and when to take more action. The following post takes a closer look at these choices:
Parents: Should You Choose Your Child’s Friends?
Remember that moment when you held your baby for the first time. Along with suddenly turning into a parent, you were smacked with the responsibility of another human being. You chose between cloth and disposable diapers, between breastfeeding and formula, between steel and BPA free plastic…at every stage of that little person’s life – you made a choice.
Thinking about peer influence
This rang in my ears especially loudly when this past week my four year old said a bad word. I did a double take and asked him what he said. He just shrugged and repeated his sentence like it was nothing out of the ordinary. Hit with the word again, I asked him if he knew what he was saying was wrong and a bad word. He shrugged again and said A (his best friend at school) says it all the time. Read more at Kids Stop Press…
When you believe your child’s behavior is being negatively influenced by their friends, you need to address it immediately. As someone wisely observed: “What you do not correct you affirm.”
How can you tell if your child has a bad friend? Or if someone around them is a bad influence? How can you make the best judgment about your child’s friends? These are all important questions, which the following post examines:
What’s a parent to do if your child is hanging out with kids you don’t approve of, whose values and upbringing don’t match your own? You want to give him the freedom to choose his friends, without throwing his values, morals and convictions out of the window. It’s a tough dilemma that you’re bound to face, sooner or later.
Here are some tips for navigating the road ahead.
#1 Don’t judge a book by its cover
Get to know your child’s friend. Don’t base your judgment on first impressions. He might seem rowdy and violent, but that could be more a sign of a high energy personality and boredom than an innate desire to wreak havoc or cause bodily harm. She might talk a lot about boys, not because she’s into them (at the tender age of four) but because her teenage big sister is always talking about her latest crush. Conversely, kids who appear clean and innocent may be masking inner turmoil and deep-rooted issues.
One of the best ways to evaluate the character and quality of your child’s friends is to invite them to visit your home. Close interactions will help you assess the peers your son or daughter is hanging out with. You will then be in a better position to make informed decisions about the friendship.
To keep from focusing on the negative, you should acquaint yourself with what a good friend for your child will look like. Here is one mother’s helpful description:
What Makes a Good Friend — 10 Signs Your Child’s Friend is a Good Influence
After my daughter Chloe went through a particularly difficult friendship with a girl who turned out to be a bully, I’ve thought a lot about what makes a good friend for my children. I am so thankful for the friends who have been good influences in my children’s lives. I’m not just grateful for the friendship, I’m grateful for the examples they have set and the way they help my daughters to be their best selves.
I’ve found that the signs that your child has a good friend are often the exact opposite of the signs that a friend might be a bully or a person who ends up bringing your child down.
Clearly, it is important for your child to be surrounded by the right influences from an early age. It is not hyperbole to state that enrollment in a great preschool can set your child on a path that leads to life-long success.
At Spanish for fun!, our innovative immersion program teaches children to speak Spanish and appreciate the culture. We strive to instill the values of empathy and multiculturism in our students. We provide them with a global understanding of life and promote holistic development of both their cognitive and social skills.
If you are in Wake Forest and looking for daycare that will offer your child the benefits discussed in this post, Spanish for fun! is your best option. We combine the loving care that your child needs with Spanish language education, cultural learning and lots of fun.
Parenting a small child comes with lots of joys and plenty of challenges. Your best and worst qualities are often brought to the surface as you undergo experiences that stretch your emotions to what sometimes seems like the breaking point. Because of this, you may occasionally end up feeling like a not-so-good parent, and blame yourself for everything that’s going wrong.
Relax. No parent is perfect, so try not to be too hard on yourself. Just remember that there are many changes going on within and around your preschooler. It helps to enter their world for a while, to get a better understanding of their thinking and how they comprehend life around them.
First, you need a clear picture of where your preschooler is at in terms of development. The following post looks at this in depth:
What You Need To Know To Be A Good Parent To Your Preschooler
Inside: Knowing the massive amount of development and growth your preschooler is undergoing will help you not to personalize their behaviors, allowing you to be the calm, steady leader they need.
The preschool years can be tricky business. Our tiny toddlers are beginning to resemble actual grown people. They’re starting to sound more like them, too.
Heck, we can even legitimately “hang” with them now, due to their budding sense of humor and ability to engage in semi-normal conversation (even if the subject matter is Paw Patrol).
Then, somewhere along the way, while enjoying these new qualities and rejoicing in their newfound ability to occasionally wipe their own bottom, we mistakenly start to believe they should be able to do all of the adult stuff. Read more at Parents With Confidence…
Take it easy and let your child go through the stage she is in. Have expectations, but ensure that they are neither too high nor too low. That way, she won’t get discouraged about matching the standards you set, and this will help her become more responsible.
Like most parents, you may be anxious about your preschooler’s social interactions with others. Will he have the ability to control his emotions and be the kind of pleasant person everyone wants to be around? The following post describes how you can help your preschooler do that:
How to Help Your Preschooler Handle Emotions and Avoid Outbursts
Preschoolers may look older than toddlers, but in spite of their expanding vocabulary and growing independence, they can still feel overwhelmed by strong emotions like anger, sadness, fear, and anxiety. “Their brain is growing at a rapid rate and their emotions don’t always keep pace,” says Katie Hurley, a child psychotherapist and author of The Happy Kid Handbook: How to Raise Joyful Children in a Stressful World.
However, researchers at Arizona State University found that kids who could handle challenging emotions were more resilient and better at paying attention at home and in school. And a study from the University of North Carolina at Greensboro linked kids’ emotional regulation with future academic success, including higher math and reading scores. Don’t expect your kid to get the hang of it instantly. Backsliding is inevitable at this age, but you can offer the tools to help get those emotions in check.
We live in a stressful world, so the sooner your child is able to gain emotional intelligence, the better for him. This will guarantee that he develops the essential coping skills he’ll need.
Perhaps, another way to help you better understand your preschooler is by entering her world for a moment. The following post describes a typical day in a preschooler’s life:
A day in the life of a preschooler…
Parent: “What did you do in school today?”
Twelve years ago this conversation might have sounded like this:
Parent: “What did you do in school today?”
Preschooler: “I played with the blocks, and painted a picture and sang some songs and played dress-up and read some books and played with play dough and went on the playground and had a snack and danced with my friend and saw a butterfly and counted to 100 and learned about the letter C…”
Parent: “Did you have fun?”
Preschooler: “YES!” Read more at SSC Music Blog…
The importance of fun in your child’s life cannot be underestimated as part of the crucial developmental ingredients. Making learning fun is therefore very crucial for the healthy development of your preschooler.
At Spanish for fun! we embrace play as a core element of our learning strategy. And as our name suggests, we offer a Spanish immersion program that teaches children the Spanish language and culture in new and fun ways. This provides them with the proven, life-long cognitive benefits of being bilingual along with a high level of cultural awareness that expands their worldview.
If you are searching for a preschool that will offer your child a safe, loving environment and an educational jumpstart, Spanish for fun! is your best option. Get in touch with us today to schedule a tour of our Wake Forest campus. Call 919-881-1695 or complete the form on our website. We look forward to showing you why your child will thrive with us.